DM Coaching and Development

Why office gossip can be good for you

This story in Forbes caught my eye as spending time on water cooler talk is something that I do recommend in my coaching sessions for women. Office gossip isn’t always bad for you, the reality is that many deals are informally agreed and relationships strengthened during this ‘down time’ with colleagues. If you never participate in the banter and the ‘what are you doing this weekend’ type conversations you may not be seen as a team player.  As Donna Eder co-author of the paper "Strategies of Adult Gossip" says, when you aren’t the leader you don’t have as much power to express yourself directly, so a well placed piece of gossip could do the job for you. The professional female needs to learn this social skill and use it to her advantage to create camaraderie particularly if she works in a mostly male dominated environment, where she may be excluded from the golfing and drinking outings.

Stop Quibbling over "Real" Techies, Scientists and Mathematicians

In a recent post for WITsend, the Computer Weekly blog, Rebecca Thompson complained about something I have often noticed. When talking about women in traditionally male areas of IT and Science, I often hear both men and women say "she's not a real scientist or techie". I have seen female scientists on the telly criticised for going into science communication, and not "real science" whereas their male co-presenters are applauded for making such technical areas accessible to a wider audience and for "keeping it real". As explained by blogger Rebecca Thompson: "Irrespective of whether they climbed the ranks of developer or programmer jobs, the fact is these women work in technology. They have brought their skills, experience and ability to the technology industry. They should be applauded, not sneered at". The reasons behind these views, it seems, is that women are seen to operate on the "lighter" or more managerial sides of technology, working within the IT sphere in a portion of some wider business aims, such as in marketing and advertising or business consultancy, rather than working as code writers, developers or IT support technicians - professions that are seen as more stereotypically techie. Still, ladies we will get much further together, not by tearing each other down. 

The Nom de Plume: Why One Female Writer Used A Male Name for More Money

If you have been looking for a short-cut to better pay and greater respect away from the glass ceiling- you have to read the article by James Chartrand, the copyblogger - a female writer who for years chose to work under the name "James" simply to earn more money. It is shocking how much more money and better-received her work (as a professional female!) was when she simply changed her name. She writes "The answer was plain. Without really thinking much about it, I tried an experiment when I chose my new pseudonym. Taking a man’s name opened up a new world. It helped me earn double and triple the income of my true name, with the same work and service. No hassles. Higher acceptance. And gratifying respect for my talents and round-the-clock work ethic. Business opportunities fell into my lap. People asked for my advice, and they thanked me for it, too." I won't spoil the rest of her great blog piece, but it is one of those stories that you don't know whether to laugh at her ingenuity or cry at the lack of justice in it all.  

Skirting the Issue: Where is Gender Equality in 2010?

A regular reader of this blog, Margarita George, recently forwarded me this article abot gender diversity and career women "Skirting the Issue: Why Women Aren't Making it to the Board" which is a great overview of much of the research on professional women in the UK in terms of pay gap, representation on boards, career development, entrepreneurship and self-imposed barriers - and it features a gender researcher and friend of mine, Elisabeth Kelan at Kings College London. It is a good read if you are interested to find out where we are as women as we enter 2010. Thanks for the heads up Margarita! 

Banter or Bullying? When "Joking" Becomes Sex Discrimination

In my coaching work with professional women, I hear hair-raising tales about women who are subject to "banter" such as being rated on a scale of 1-10 for their looks, being called "stupid blondes" or "bimbo", having e-mails whiz around with pornographic images, seeing colleagues take clients to strip clubs, and even prostitutes - only to be told  when they complain - that they as women need to "lighten up". That's why this article by Rowan Pelling about recent sex discrimination cases in the City, in the Telegraph was so interesting. She writes "While the companies deny the allegations, it's tempting to view such stories as "Carry On Hedge Fund" – or ask why women in the City can't just develop the required rhino-hide and treat it all as a joke. But what would firms make of women who openly leered over men's crotches, told them they should be brickies, or brought Chippendales to corporate events?". While I agree with her point - the real story is in the comments section after the article, which is primarily made up of harsh vitriol about these "bitches in the office" from a variety of readers, not many of whom are sympathetic to the plights of women in the city who "just can't hack it". Its enough to make you feel we are entering 1010 not 2010. 

How Much Do Your Male Colleagues Earn? Bring on the Compulsory Pay Audits

Traditionally, companies have had gag clauses on employees discussing how much they earned with colleagues. It has been a highly secretive way of keeping employees in the dark when it comes to negotiating their packages - useful to companies - but rife for abuse and gender disparities. As discussed in a recent article in Australia's The Age magazine "Women Still Trail in Pay Stakes" : "Many Australians believe women won equal pay in the `70s — but they are wrong," ACTU president Sharan Burrow said. Among the union demands are compulsory "pay equity audits" which would require companies to disclose what male and female employees are paid — including bonuses — at all levels of the corporation. It would be a simple way of changing the corporate culture if people knew what it was that men and women were earning up through the pay scale. Making them part of the reporting cycle for companies would make a huge difference." I think there is a long way to go, but I suspect compulsory pay audits would split the City assunder for all that they would unearth. 

When it Comes to Equality....Look at What Companies Do, Not What they Say

As part of the promotion for my new book "Beyond the Boys' Club" I have been asked by more than one journalist to name which companies "have got it right" when it comes to equality. My answer? Look not at what companies say is their policy, but rather what they are proactively doing to retain and develop their women. And indeed it is hard to sometimes see beyond the lip service. As an article in the Observer entitled "How Can Britain Have So Few Women on its Boards?" explained: "Few companies would boast of their reluctance to promote women. Indeed, the overwhelming majority of the top 350 listed on the FTSE claim to have equal opportunities policies in place.  But in business, as in politics, it's worth paying attention to what people do, rather than what they say. Of the same FTSE 350 companies, women occupy only 232 out of 2,742 board seats. The proportion holding executive directorships is smaller still: 34 out of 970. Those figures, from new research published in the Observer today, confirm what many women in business have long suspected – the old glass ceiling is intact."

Business Insight in Addition to Badges...Girl Scouts Moves On

After reading the Washington Post article about a Girl Scout "Camp CEO" that pairs traditional scouting activities with lectures on business from Washington area business leaders, I wished I could go back to my scouting days!  Local business women joined the girls for a week of fun and business knowledge to help them think how they will manage work- life balance and break the frontiers still left behind by the current generation. As explained by the writer Jennifer Buske:  ' "The women at camp included chief executives, law firm partners, judges, doctors and entrepreneurs. Howard University's senior vice president and a chef who once cooked for Julia Child also attended the camp. The professionals taught the 13- to 17-year-old girls lessons on leadership, teamwork, persistence and confidence. This camp is different because it's not just fun, but it's also helping you plan your future," said 15-year-old Kristina Chin of Prince George's County. "The message I will remember is there will be struggles, but even if it seems everything is going downhill, there is always an upside."

Is the City Too Ruthless to Attract Smart Women?

I recently found an article on www.hereisthecity.com written by a city insider who counters the charges that women aren't smart enough to make a career in the city with a stunning riposte that it it the hostile atmosphere and the 24/7 culture which puts women off, not the "high standards" for intelligence as some have speculated. The article Where are all the City Girls? explains:  "No evidence indicates that banking attracts the brightest people. The unspoken assumption is that society’s highest-paid individuals are the smartest, and thus, if the City is filled with men, men must be smarter, unless women have a good excuse for being absent. Naturally, banking - like all very well paid jobs - attracts highly intelligent people, but only the ones with certain personality traits. Those traits might be more common in men. Maybe girls simply don’t find the number-crunching, inside-trading, hostile-takeover games of investment banking as fascinating. In the same way that you never find any female dictators, perhaps females just don’t have the killer instincts it takes to bulldoze their way to a questionable sort of 'City success'. Surely, ruthlessness and mathematical talent are not necessarily correlated. So why should anyone be shocked to find that most mathematically-gifted people - including women - would flee from the idea of spending their waking life working amongst the City’s abrasive predators?"

Women Are Heard Less and Interrupted More in Meetings

I am fascinated by how gender impacts what gets said and who gets heard in the workplace. Re-reading one of my favourite books "Talking from 9-5" by Deborah Tannen, I was looking over some research she discussed that found in peer-directed mixed gender groups, "young women tended to acquiesce more, to be interrupted more, and to initiate less. Whereas the young men in these groups interrupted each other as well, they were more likely to persist in the face of those interruptions until they made their points, whereas the young women usually just backed off and gave up when their attempts to speak were met with interruptions." I know that sometimes when I am in mixed gender groups, I make my point, but often back off as I develop this unhelpful "I can't be bothered" attitude when I think that I would prefer not argue just for the sake of it. She points out that while peer-directed groups might appear to be the most egalitarian, that employers and managers keen to hear the opinions of their women might do better with asking everyone to speak in turn regarding their opinion rather than leaving it up to the "winner takes all" type of melee which can break out in most boardrooms.